Blog by Sumana Harihareswara, Changeset founder

31 Mar 2001, 3:56 a.m.

More morosity, & some hope

Hi, reader. I wrote this in 2001 and it's now more than five years old. So it may be very out of date; the world, and I, have changed a lot since I wrote it! I'm keeping this up for historical archive purposes, but the me of today may 100% disagree with what I said then. I rarely edit posts after publishing them, but if I do, I usually leave a note in italics to mark the edit and the reason. If this post is particularly offensive or breaches someone's privacy, please contact me.

I've no anchor, and no mainsail.
Women's work is never done.
Maybe if I weren't so fearful--
maybe I could have more fun.

"Time is out of joint"? -- no, the place. Sometimes I feel as though I have no sense of place, of permanent home. So perhaps it's more that the space-time is out of joint.

Tasks v. chores. It has long been observed that men (traditionally) perform tasks, while women do chores. Women are the maintenance crew, the infrastructure that allows all the other stuff to happen. And I'm pretty sure I'd like to be a guy here. Laundry and dishes and such sort of soothe me, since I know how to do them. I can master the art of dishwashing. But I'd really like to do something that stays done. And that is the promise of art. Remember the end of Vladimir Nabokov's Lolita? Art is the only way that you and I can live forever, my Lolita. (I wish I had Lolita with me. What a great book.)

Senate confirmation hearings. Perhaps it is not such a good philosophy to life a life continually in fear of the future. Perhaps it does not make for a worthwhile life if I ask myself before every risk, "What if this comes up in my Senate confirmation hearings?"


Originally published by Sumana Harihareswara at http://www.kuro5hin.org/story/2001/3/31/155628/565