Blog by Sumana Harihareswara, Changeset founder

06 Jul 2001, 5:17 a.m.

The Pakazhitye Mnye State

Hi, reader. I wrote this in 2001 and it's now more than five years old. So it may be very out of date; the world, and I, have changed a lot since I wrote it! I'm keeping this up for historical archive purposes, but the me of today may 100% disagree with what I said then. I rarely edit posts after publishing them, but if I do, I usually leave a note in italics to mark the edit and the reason. If this post is particularly offensive or breaches someone's privacy, please contact me.

Missouri is the "Show Me State" (in the USA), and I lived there once, and "Pakazhitye Mnye" is "show me," and never mind.

I had a very involved dream last night. I've been having lots of very involved dreams recently. A number of the other participants in my program here in St. Petersburg have been reporting the same phenomenon. It's not surprising.

I remember using verbs of motion in this dream, and speaking Russian to my family back in the USA (none of my family speaks or understands Russian). I also remember distorted allusions and references to Kazan Cathedral (near which I study), Ender's Game, alligators and crocodiles, an old political science teacher of mine, the discussions on race that I had with a Dutch woman recently, and my rather unfounded fear of document checks by the militia.

I think yesterday I was just in a pretty bad mood for about three or four hours. I'm a lot better now.

Moscow! We leave on the train for Moscow late tonight, and return to St. Petersburg early Tuesday morning. I'll try to post every day when I'm there.

I miss The West Wing.

The Dutch woman -- Shaklin? -- and I had a lot of conversation about Russia, the USA, Holland, race, feminism, individualism, and community. I really am learning a lot about the USA from being here.

Today, whilst bored in class, I found myself remembering a Disney TV movie -- Principal Takes a Holiday -- and thinking of it as an argument for voucher and charter schools.

Today in Grammar we talked about the logic puzzle of the Christian trying to cross a river and bring across a wolf, a goat, and some cabbage. I had always been too lazy to solve it before, but today I solved it.

There is at least one stunningly beautiful woman in our group. I mean just jaw-dropping, statuesque loveliness in every aspect of her body. It's amazing! I don't think I've ever just wanted to admire the Divine Sculptor's artistry like this before. Walking through museums next to a piece like this is really quite an experience.

First published by Sumana Harihareswara at